Solicitation copy for The Order #3:
You are a member of the Order. You've been given extraordinary powers and a mandate to save the world. You've got one year. What do you do? "Calamity" James Wa was a baseball player with his whole future bright and perfect in front of him, when a drunk driver took it all away. What does HE do with extraordinary powers and a mandate to save the world? He goes looking for a little payback. Also: They're half zombie! Half hobo! ALL TERROR! The ZOBOS run roughshod on Rodeo Drive! Celebutantes and debutards beware–Botox is like ketchup to these flesh-eating, homeless weirdos, and they find your waxed and tanned skin DELICIOUS! Somebody call THE ORDER!
Seriously, who writes this stuff? Warren Simons, is it you? This is brilliant!